My pattern is becoming increasingly predicatable here - post...crickets...post...crickets. Sorry! There are a few different topics I have wanted to write about, but feel like time is a precious commodity these days that is harder to come by than a reasonably priced tank of gas.
So here I sit at work, obviously not doing anything of the sort. That really helps my predicament with the whole 'no time to think' issue, doesn't it? It seems as if I have acquired an ailment of the gray matter. I can no longer focus on anything related to work (at least not longer than a handful of emails) before I feel the strong urge to rebel against everything and just focus on this girl growing within. What is even worse is that back in January I started a program to become a certified medical transcriptionist so that I can work from home, and schoolwork (on top of 8-5 work) is quietly leaching away my baby daydreaming/research time. And I don't like it. One damn bit.
Here I am - still at work, not working, yet aggravated and unnerved because I would rather be someplace else doing things that seem far more important. I have had a few breakdown-ish moments where it feels like things are caving and that I will never get everything done before this child is born. With every thread of my being I want our girl to enter into a world that is ready for her. A place prepared with love that does not resemble one bit of the chaos that took place before she got here, and even more so, the unhappiness that clouded up our lives before her creation. Is that too much to ask?
My apologies for arriving back on the scene on such a high note...hhhmmppfff. Don't get me wrong, in the grand scheme of things these are truly times to remember and cherish (and I completely do) but it is hard for me at times to not get caught up in the minutiae of daily matters. My internal conflict and lack of focus is purely due to the fact that she deserves the very best.
*As a quick update for those playing along: We had a good doctor's appointment a few weeks ago, and have our last (yikes) 4 week appointment next week. We will get another sonogram (yay!) next week as well as a sugar coated glucose test for me (boo).
17 comments:
I'm glad you checked in, even though time seems to be flying by! I'm excited for your work-at-home-ability, that sounds fascinating. Will you keep us (or me at least!) posted on how that goes? I would love nothing more in the world than to work from home. Well maybe a successful pregnancy, but second to that, working from home would ROCK!
You know....I had to learn to go on the premise that as long as there was a place for them here everything else could wait. I went on home arrest around 29 weeks and was not able to do much...and as much as I wanted it all done, I know we have what had to be done....done. So do your best, but understand that you will do great when she is here, even if everything isn't perfect when you walk in the door with her.
I am glad your appt went well...and the glucose screen isn't that bad...at least I didn't think so.
I am so glad to hear an update from you - I hear ya with the work ADD. It's like i feellike i have to "concentrate" to bring this baby here. Good luck with your glucose test
I know how you feel, I did not want to work either and now that I am back from maternity leave I want to work even less...Don’t stress out to much about all the things that need to be done, at the end everything will work out
I totally understand being OVER work. I was teaching 6th grade English when I was pregnant, and I had the hardest time focusing. It was even worse the next school year when I returned from maternity leave. I've since quit altogether...totally worth it!
you've got a TON on your plate, girl! the ADHD is totally normal/expected. i second what m has said. our beloved showed up a month early, and we had NOTHING prepared. we had had our showers and shopped for her, but her room was a storage depot. it all turned out fine. i couldn't let her out of my sight, so she slept in a bassinet or pack-n-play in our room...for the first 9 months. by then, we had her room done ;-p what a great idea for a work-at-home opportunity! go, you! though, i have NO idea how you're handling an 8 to 5 job AND school!
we must get together for dinner soon! i will come your way (i live in pflugerville), and we'll go whereever your little girl dictates! email to come soon (as soon as i pull my head out of my arse (i'm on a contract job that's killing me))....
So you're saying this total lack of ability to focus on anything other than the tiny life inside of me is only going to become stronger? Hee hee heee
I hope the glucose test goes well!!!
I know exactly how you feel! I hope you get everything done and if you do- give me some advice on time management!!!
So glad everything is going well. Good luck with the glucose test!
Sounds like everything is going so great - congrats.
On a side note, it sounds like a good thing that I'll never be pregnant because I have a severe case of work ADD without a baby growing inside of me.
Hope you're well -- it's so quiet over there!
Pam
Hey! Just checking in and hoping you are doing ok. I hope the GT results were good. :)
Great to hear that everything is going well. Hard to believe that there is a short amount of time left!
Knock, knock. How are things?
Hey - let us know how you are doing! :)
ok i aam in need of an update!
Hi there, I was just heading down my blog roll and thought to myself...oh my goodness...it must almost be time...maybe you've vanished from the blogworld...but know that I'm thinking of you and hope that all is well!
Pam